All my life I’ve been spiritual. I’ve always known on some level that there was some force that created Nature and all it encompasses and I’ve always felt dissatisfied with Christian explanations. From the time I was about seven I searched every church I could find looking for answers and never feeling like I’d been given the right ones. I’ve been drawn to the occult for as long as I can remember read anything and everything I could get my hands on, fiction and non-fiction, alike. Before puberty, I used to tell my friends I was a Witch before I had a clue what it really meant. I remember practicing “magick” in the fruit orchard of one of the many places we lived when I was about 8 or 9, surrounded by fruit trees and even then I knew to construct some kind of Circle for protection and I was very careful not to cross the line till I finished my “rite”. After I graduated from high school I went to work for Waldenbooks where I became well-acquainted with the “Occult” section (later became the “New Age” section). I read a lot of books and finally, in oh, 1993 or so, I came across Scott Cunningham’s book, Wicca: A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner. I read it in a few days, and moved on to The Spiral Dance, which had been recommended by a friend. I learned about tarot and began to form some answers about my spirituality. The Goddess fulfilled the needs and answered the questions that Christianity could not. Though I wasn’t yet ready to become seriously involved with Witchcraft, I finally had some answers and a definition for my beliefs. In 1996 Jeff and I became Resident Assistants at Northern Arizona University, and the events that occurred in the year we held the position led to my self dedication to the gods on November 24, 1996 and also contributed to our resignation in May 1997. I took on the name of Witch or Wiccan as a badge of my spirituality.
So what do I expect to gain from my “Witchiness”? Well, first I expect to receive comfort in a system that supports my love of Nature and my gender’s creativity and fertility. Secondly, I expect to learn to channel the energies and intuition that reside within myself into positive changes for myself and my loved ones. Finally, I expect to find comfort in a religion that reflects so completely what I’ve felt all along.
My one and only fear is alienation or difficulty due to my beliefs. I especially don’t want my children to bear any burdens and I worry about how my future career might be affected if my religion were made public. I’ve already had some experience with how society accepts Witchcraft. Certainly there are those who seek to ostracize us as Satanic baby-eaters, but I know I hardly fit that stereotype as a loving mother of two. I think much of the misinformation stems from Christianity’s confusion in differentiating between Satanism and Witchcraft and the media’s willingness to perpetuate this stereotype in the name of sensationalism. As a college graduate to be, I’m certainly concerned how it would affect a prospective job if some unenlightened person were to discover that I am a Witch. I know people lose their jobs over this, especially when they might be perceived as “influencing” someone else, particularly a young person. I’ve just decided to keep this aspect of my life as low key as possible (for now), in terms of my employment, until the day I can write for a living and not worry about the opinions of any but my readers and editors. Of course, I fully realize that day may never come and I can live with that. Getting back to the original issue, I would like to say that I have some friends who are devoutly Christian and that they have pleasantly surprised me with their positive responses to my religious affiliation. It’s comforting to think that some of those who call themselves “Christian” actually practice Christ’s teachings.
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