So part of my problem is that I’m simultaneously excited about going back to Arizona and sad about leaving Bloomington. My friend Rowan, who made this move almost two years ago, tells me that’s just the way it’s going to be — yucky. I really don’t like that answer. 😉 I’m anticipating the community building I can do there — but does that take away from the community building I did here? Jeez, the healthy part of my psyche says, “Hell, no, stop being so freaking melodramatic.” But the sicker side is all, “Oh, you never stick with anything, you’re just a catalyst.” Sheesh, I don’t need my friends to beat me up — I’m doing a good enough job on my own.
Today at lunch I had the opportunity to say something and I let it go. Am I more afraid of it mattering or of it not mattering?