This Week’s Topic : Mother’s Day 2004

Last Mother’s Day we simply used the word ‘Mom’ as inspiration. This year I’d like to try something a little different because Mother’s Day is looked at by so many angles. You may respond to all or one of the following…….

As a mom, what does/would Mother’s Day mean to you? Do you have any expectations?

I didn’t have any expectations this Mother’s Day. I just wasn’t sure how it go. In the Before world, it was about getting handmade gifts from my kids, breakfast in bed and phone calls to the women in my family who are moms.

The first Mother’s Day card I ever received was back in 1993, shortly before Jasmine was born. One of my friends from high school, Cindy, sent it to me. I’ll never forget how I felt when I got that card — like I had an acknowledgement of this world I was getting ready to enter, ready or not. Jasmine was born almost a month later.

Since then, there have been cards that were really chosen by Jeff, a nice recognition of me as mom, and cards chosen or made by my girls, sometimes with guidance from teachers at school and sometimes made entirely on their own. These cards have made me feel guilty because I didn’t feel like I lived up to them or warm, loved and appreciated. Sometimes both.

Mostly, Mother’s Day is a day that reminds me why I wanted to be a mom in the first place and what the rewards are for the sacrifices I make.

As a son or daughter, what does Mother’s Day mean to you? Does your mom deserve a special day?

When I was little, I loved Mother’s Day — the art projects in school were a fun break from the normal stuff we did. Sometimes Mother’s Day was paired with May Day celebrations. In hindsight, I find that highly appropriate, though I wonder how much the teachers knew about that. Mostly, I loved the secrets — making stuff for mom, who did so much for me, and anticipating her reaction.

When I was older, I would try to do things for my mom on this day, like cook for her, clean for her, whatever I could give back. I don’t know if I really recognized then that doing so was an act of appreciation for all she did, but I do now. Mom was a great judge of character and was rarely wrong about my friends, or, in some cases “friends.” She was cool enough to steal my clothes and kept my friends entertained by kidding with them. Other kids liked my mom. She had a sort of “Roseanne” thing going on.

Now, as a mother, I don’t know if I can express how much I love my mom and how grateful I am for the way she raised me and continues to support me as an adult. She has been there for me with each new addition to our family, she has given Jeff and I the gift of time with our children. When she takes the girls, she genuinely loves the time she spends with them. No guilt involved — and that is a huge gift in and of itself. This year she was with me when Jeff and I let Jasmine go, supportive in every way, even though she was also experiencing a huge loss.

So as a daughter, Mother’s Day is a day to remember all these things. My mother deserves nothing but the best. She didn’t have the greatest example, growing up, on “all things mom,” but somehow she managed to be the best one anyway. I could write for a long time about fab she is, but there are other Mother’s Days to write about and I have to save my material.