Today, the dreaded phone call. I keep spontaneously bursting into tears and I can hardly type, so please forgive any typos. My fingers aren't working. I guess since I'm sitting it's the equivalent of my legs falling out from underneath me. Jeff called me this morning and said they had to put Jasmine on the … Continue reading Not Good
Death & Grief
Stormy Weather
Holy cow! I had no idea so many of you would actually come check this out! Several people have written me in emails and asked for mailing info for Jasmine. The best bet would probably be to send cards and letters to Jeff at Ronald McDonald House, and he can take them in to her. … Continue reading Stormy Weather
Blindfolded
I'm going to St. Louis on Wednesday night... I'm so glad to be going. Jasmine is doing a little better, Jeff says, but it doesn't sound better enough to put my mind at rest. I can't help but feeling like I'm going through the stages of dying with her, except that I'm not with her. … Continue reading Blindfolded
Revelations
Jeff spoke with the doctors yesterday and here are the latest revelations: The blood tests confirmed that Jasmine is having a form of rejection where there are antibodies in her blood that are attacking her lungs. This form of rejection is rare and the treatment of cleaning the plasma is a new one, albeit one … Continue reading Revelations
The Boring Life
The most unlikely person has asked me to update my diary... so I will. This one's for you... you know who you are. 😉 Antibodies were found in Jasmine's blood, confirming the theory that she is having a kind of rejection. Her new lungs have an antigen in them that is causing this and it's … Continue reading The Boring Life
One Step Forward, Three Steps Back
Jasmine has slowly started to slide back. The next plan is to replace the plasma in her blood so as to filter out any antibodies that might be attacking her lungs. Today they put the bipap back on her so she could sleep. I have no idea what to think now. On Monday they are … Continue reading One Step Forward, Three Steps Back
Update on Jasmine
Just a quick update. Jasmine is doing better these past few days. Still no idea what made her this way, still on lots of oxygen, still in ICU. No word on when she'll be out and what life will be like after this (i.e. whether she'll make a full recovery and be like she was … Continue reading Update on Jasmine
Turkeys on Rollerblades
Today things seems quieter. They are slowly weaning Jasmine down on the bipap machine. The steroid burst started yesterday with some interesting side effects -- hallucinations and amped up emotional outbursts. Yesterday we got to answer questions about reality (as in, "Is this a real bed?" "Is this a real room?") and turkeys on rollerblades … Continue reading Turkeys on Rollerblades
Numbers
The outer wall of Jasmine's world is defined by numbers. She's on x liters of oxygen. Her blood oxygen is x. Her blood pressure is x over x. She gets x milliliters of this med over x hours and on and on it goes. Sometimes when I write updates, all I do is spew numbers … Continue reading Numbers
Bruised Dragonfly Wings
Jasmine is still in ICU -- no real change for better or worse. She is awake and mostly alert most of the time, though she tires very easily. She says she's going to beat this thing. In a nutshell, what is happening is that the tissues of her lungs have some kind of infection. They … Continue reading Bruised Dragonfly Wings
by the sea, by the sea, by the beautiful sea 